Warning: This post has a LOT of potential to hurt people’s feelings — particularly if you’ve been unsuccessfully married before.
Ever since initiating myself as a chaos mage, I see magick everywhere.
Many of our culture’s “traditions” are actually magickal rites, the original intentions of which have been forgotten over time — just like how, during a game of “telephone,” a sentence gets misheard over and over again until it’s ultimately meaningless.
For example, college graduation ceremonies feature Saturnian “black cube” symbolism:
Because of this, some have speculated that graduation is a covert initiation into a Saturn cult. If that’s true, then the unwitting initiates (aka “graduates”) are upholders of Saturn’s binding, restricting and deathly power in this world.
The original designers of the educational institution were likely familiar with Saturn’s symbolism. But most of today’s college students, are not.
For that reason, whatever potential benefit could have been granted during this magickal rite, fails to manifest positively for the participants, because they aren’t conscious of what they’re taking part in. Instead, they unconsciously “go through the motions,” thereby generating psychic power for the institution… but none for themselves.
That’s the thing about magick: It requires you to be conscious and intentional about what you’re doing, in order for you to reap the benefits.
Because, per the mechanics of Lesser Magick, if you aren’t reaping the benefits of a magickal ritual, then somebody else is.
Now back to the point about our culture being steeped in magick rituals:
Christmas gifts, Easter egg hunts, birthday cakes… all of these common symbolic traditions had magickal origins, and therefore hold immense potential to empower the individual who engages with them.
And of all of these popular, hidden-in-plain-sight magickal rites, marriage may be the most potentially powerful of all.
Most wedding rituals are a conglomerate of smaller rituals, like having a child bring the ring down the aisle, or carrying the bride over a threshold.
But that’s not what makes marriage a magick rite.
Marriage ceremonies are highly customizable, so these lighter rituals vary from couple to couple. But at the core, this is what Marriage essentially is:
A man (usually dressed in black)
and a woman (usually dressed in white)
exchanging vows to weld themselves to each other
in all circumstances (sickness, health, better, worse, etc.),promising to stay together until Death,
binding each other with symbolic rings,
and sealing the pact with a kiss
all in the presence of witnesses
Hmmmmmm…
A pair of opposites (male and female)…
merged together irreversibly…
Have you caught on yet?
IT’S ALCHEMY.
MARRIAGE IS AN ALCHEMICAL RITE.
The Marriage of Opposites, or Chemical Wedding, or Coniunctio Oppositorum, is a term from alchemy that means combining two opposite substances, or essences, or even ideas into a unity greater than the sum of its parts.
Ancient alchemists understood that when two halves of a whole are brought back together, wholeness/Unity is restored. This willful dissolution of opposites into Oneness releases a massive amount of energy — something like nuclear fusion.
In fact, the final stage of alchemy (Coagulation) is ruled by The Sun, our planet’s most powerful energy generator, because
The resulting substance [of Coagulation] is the foundation of the Philosopher's Stone, which has the ability to perfect other substances, heal wounds, and cure disease.
Hidden in plain sight is the fact that when two “opposite” people consciously merge together in marriage, enough energy is generated to heal all ailments, forever. (Immortality, anyone?)
But what happens when people marry each other unconsciously?
What happens when they just go through the motions of “tying the knot” without realizing the magnitude, the gravity, of their spell-binding vow?
Well…
…all that energy goes to waste.
And we end up with a world where “marriage” is essentially meaningless, divorce and infidelity are rampant, and people are embittered about Love itself — as if Love caused this problem!!!
Now before anyone comes at me to justify their own divorce, or anyone’s divorce, let me be clear:
We’re talking about magick.
And as any magickian can tell you, “Your word is your bond.”
Your words can create realities. Your words cast spells. Your words are powerful enough to give life and take it. I wrote all about that here:
Like it or not, the words you say out loud matter.
I didn’t make that up. It’s a Universal Law. So if this upsets you, take it up with God or something.
So as it pertains to the marriage vow, “until Death do us part” matters very bigly.
If you’ve never thought about it before, think about it now: What does it mean to vow yourself to someone, “for better or for worse,” until Death?
What if they become disabled one day and you have to take care of them?
What if they cheat on you?
What if they become abusive?
What if they stop being attractive?
What if you stop having sex?
What if they gamble all your money away?
What if…?
If those hypothetical situations seem unbearable, then don’t. say. the. Death. vow. Nobody is forcing you to!
That brings me to the next pillar of magick: You have free will.
You’re free to concoct your own magickal ritual to honor your mutual love with a person…
…one that doesn’t bind you to them, in all circumstances, until Death… but rather, honors your freedom and their freedom.
You’re free to design your wedding in alignment with your values instead of going along with traditions you don’t know the ramifications of.
You’re also free to not get married at all.
You’re free to ignore the societal pressures to “find The One,” “settle down,” “buy a house with a white picket fence,” “have 2.5 kids,” etc.
You’re just free in general :)
And with free will comes radical responsibility. Why does this marriage conversation even matter? Because our choices impact each other. Collectively, we’ve created quite a mess of marriage as an alchemical ritual. The fallout from our collective nonchalance is staggering. As mentioned before, our world is now mired in confusion about what Love itself is, or if Love is even real… and the high failure rate of marriages has a lot to do with that.
Awakening to, and reclaiming, the potential magickal power of Marriage requires us — all of us — to take responsibility for how we’ve freely contributed to this disaster.
I’m writing this because I’ve made my own share of unconscious vows. Not in marriage, but in life in general. We all have. Every vow matters, from the big things (like saying “I’m going to be with you forever!”) to the small things (like “I’m going to start a new diet tomorrow!”)
What I love about magick is that it’s an ongoing challenge to become conscious of what was previously unconscious.
For example: Had I been a magician back when I was in college, I might have recognized all the Saturnian symbolism… and refused to participate in the graduation ceremony (or attend college at all, honestly).
But since I already made that mistake, I accept the consequences of my unconscious participation in a Saturnian magickal rite…
…and I choose to consciously, willfully, be care-full about what institutions I’ll lend my power to in the future.
I am not perfect at “being conscious” (not even close)
but just trying to be more aware of my power, and the impact I have on others, has been amply rewarding.
And so it feels like a responsibility to present people with these opportunities for reflection upon our words and actions. I live, and love, to incite potential. I’m a Chaos Magician. That’s what we do :)
So let’s get some Potential flowing here, shall we?
Imagine if all sex was conscious sex.
Imagine if all conception was conscious conception.
Very interesting. A Chaos Mage. The black cube is also the representation of very strong Devine masculine energies. The most powerful male crystal is Black Garnet which comes in black cubes and dodecahedron. Which is strange being in the colour spectrum it's the white flame.
The dark and light, the Devine Feminine and Masculine, to me is deism.
Life and marriage is strange in these times.
I wanted to share a dream that I had last night, and this post seems as good a place as any:
I dreamed Keanu Reeves wanted to go out with me, so I went on a couple of dates with him. He was very nice! But while Keanu and I were in a theater waiting for a movie to start, I suddenly realized how much I missed my husband, so I got up, ran outside, and tried to call him. Somebody else answered, and I was panicking, desperate to get through. Then I woke up and my husband was there next to me.
It was so flattering to be asked out by Mr. Reeves, but not worth losing my marriage over 😅